I had an extremely interesting walk to work this morning! Well, in truth it wasn’t so bad, so I thought things were healing nicely. Alas, as the day progressed they felt like they were getting worse. Stupid, stupid injury. If only it had been caused by some cheap-arsed store-bought costume I’d be sitting on a legal goldmine right now! As it is, I’m just sitting in a rather uncomfortable position a la Average Man on The Tube. Boom, boom.
It is only a matter of time before my Colleague I Suspect Is Up To Something sweeps through to tell me it ain’t ladylike to have me knees apart when sat at my desk; despite the fact that I’m in trousers and you’d have to sit in my lap to see em. Seriously; she has swept through before, armed with the Daily Mail, to show me some photos of David Cameron’s wife – posing for some leaked photos that were supposed to be private, fully-clothed, and facing away from the camera with her knees apart – and explain to me that this isn’t ladylike. It’s a good thing she doesn’t read the Sun, she’d have had a coronary by now.
And when the pain got too much and I finally dared lock myself in the loo and inspect the damage; well. Yesterday I made a root-veg curry and included some old sweet potatoes that I’d found at the back of the fridge. If you’ve ever taken an old and well-loved potato peeler to a rather elderly sweet potato, you have a result that looks… like the inside of my thighs look at the moment. Except me thighs are actually rather more lurid in colour. And I am short several square inches of skin.
I was a big wuss and did not go to the fighting, because every step was like having a waxing. I assume. Instead, stayed home and made swede and bacon pie fillings, and siphoned off the raspberry and the rosehip wine. Woo, my first non-kit wine! I had a glass of the sedimenty stuff at the bottom of the raspberry one, just to check.