I had high hopes for today’s outing, because not only is Legoland one of the Bossman’s favourite things ever, but there are no living things in Legoland, so the chances of me making a tit of myself were far lower! Hurrah! (Please god).
And indeed, at first things went according to plan, even though we had to drive a lot further than usual. Way out into the countryside, in fact, where there were genuine (holiday) trailer parks and farms full of orange trees (which I got no photos of) and… this!
(If it is illegible: the guy’s Christmas-style decoration of his own rear window says, The Enemy: Liberals, Muslims, IRS).
Seriously, I have seen no bumper stickers here at all, and this one must be worth at least twenty points, right? (It has the Christian fish and everything. I’ve only ever seen the Darwin one, back home!)
The Bossman made me wait until we were in his blind spot to take it, in case he was carrying. So we made it to the park okay.
There was a devastating absence of visitors to the park (hurrah!) and no queues for anything ever. So we went on a wee safari-cart ride, taking photos of life-size lego safari animals, and that was all very satisfactory. So much so that I was all, Let us go on the dinocoaster ride, for it is a very small and tame rollercoaster and I have seen all the dips and they are not more than thirty degrees, so we will just go up and down a bit, like a ship at sea!
How very wrong I was.
Also, it was only after we got off again that the Bossman pointed out that you don’t see many wooden rollercoasters these days.
Even that tiny bit of excitement was too much excitement, so we proceeded with the Bossman’s favourite pastime, which is taking photos of all the lego things that people have built, and I got to point out ones he might have missed, such as the lego rabbit in the lego pepper-garden, and the lego owl in the tree above the lego deer. Hmm. It appears we may be old before our time. On the other hand, we’re in Legoland having a great old time and with nary a small child to bother us with constant whinging for snacks and toilet breaks and beer and Smoker’s Island (that is my job, thank you).
We did go on a ride where you have to shoot things with laser guns; I lost. Bugger, and I was convinced I would be really great at that sort of thing, too! Also (and of course) it is one of those ones where they take your picture on the way round (like on the rollercoasters – an extra incentive never to go on one, if ever I needed it) so we did break the habit of a lifetime and splurge on a lego-brick wall with our photo on, mainly because I have an expression like an extremely offended owl, and while it’s embarrassing as hell, it is at least hilarious.
No, you may not see it.
Instead, here are lots of photos of Stuff Made of Lego.
A strange feeling of deja vu prevails…
And I got a photo of some orange harvesting after all!